Chapter Ten
Rev. William R. Johnson

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Who shall ascend to the hill of the Lord,
Who shall stand in God's holy place?
Those who have clean hands and a pure heart,
Who have not lifted up their souls unto vanity.

Of all the issues confronting the United Methodist Church as it seeks to relate to its gay and lesbian members, perhaps the most difficult is Christian marriage. For the vast majority of heterosexuals, marriage is the most intimate, personal dimension of our selves. The traditions and feelings surrounding marriage are at the very heart of our lives — from earliest childhood, when we observe the marriage of our parents, to our own experiences as adults, when we choose our mates. In fact, many heterosexuals who are deeply committed to the full inclusion of homosexuals in the life and ministry of the church turn squeamish about the idea of two people of the same sex getting married.

Nevertheless, if we wish to deal fairly and honestly with gay men and lesbians, to treat them as "persons of sacred worth," we must look with fresh eyes on what the church should do regarding marriage. In doing so, we need to focus our attention on the appropriate role the church should play, not as a functionary of the state, but as Christ’s body on earth. And if we are to be Christ’s body — that vessel making real God’s kingdom in the world — we must join with the Psalmist in asking:

Who is qualified to stand before the altar of the church seeking God’s blessing?

What a haunting question for anyone who claims to follow Jesus Christ. Surely the answer must simultaneously be "no one," and — because of God’s act in Jesus Christ — "everyone."

In the United Methodist Church, the qualification for heterosexual couples seeking to marry is little more than their desire to enter into a committed relationship based on mutual love, honor, and respect. There is no requirement of Christian discipleship, and, in most cases, no requirement even of church membership.

From a theological perspective, this lack of requirement is not surprising. The Christian church is a community of faith called into being through God’s grace. We trust that God is the judge of our qualifications, and we have been assured, through the life and ministry of Jesus, that God welcomes all.

Given this openness, it is all the more confusing that the United Methodist Church has determined to deny the altar to people of the same sex regardless of any other qualification. The desire for a loving and committed relationship, the desire to form a family and live within the care of a faith community — none of it makes any difference.

Make no mistake: Despite the degrading stereotypes, there is no doubt that homosexuals with such wholesome desires exist in abundance. Thousands of gay couples have publicly, and at some personal risk, identified themselves as committed and loving partners and now are asking for the church’s understanding and blessing.

How does the Bible direct us on this issue? Interestingly, it has very little to say about any religious wedding ceremonies, and few — if any appear — in Scripture. In fact, today’s wedding tradition actually evolved out of a postscript to what was considered a legal formality. In medieval times, after a couple established their marriage under the law by exchanging vows (often on the porch of the church), they entered the church to file a record of their legal agreement and to receive a blessing.

Out of that simple ritual grew what we know as the modern wedding, an elaborate event with major legal and religious components. Yet, in spite of the ways we may perceive these two components to be intertwined, they remain distinctly separate. When the church carries out its proper religious role, it is celebrating the event of two people committing themselves to a life-long, monogamous relationship, and it is offering its support and blessing to the couple. The state’s refusal to grant legal status to marriages between people of the same sex should not inhibit the church from exercising its role to celebrate and to bless such relationships. Truly, the only inhibiting factor is a handful of Bible passages fraught with ambiguity on the subject of homosexuality.

So we must ask ourselves: If we believe that sexual expression is God’s "good gift" to all, and if we believe a committed, monogamous relationship is the moral example with which the church witnesses to the world, then why is celibacy the only choice that faithful homosexuals have been given by the church? Why is the church denying its blessing?

And how can this denial be considered a moral stance when it also sends the implicit message that committed same-sex partnerships simply don’t matter?

Rather than maligning such acts of devotion, the church would be better served rejoicing in the existence of all couples, homosexual and heterosexual, who wish to stand before the altar. Surely it’s time to rethink the church’s decisions on these issues, to bring our practice in line with our theology, and to allow the church’s clergy to exercise their pastoral responsibility to serve all under their care, regardless of sexual orientation.